Low Self-Esteem: Signs, Causes and How to Build It
Low self-esteem means having a persistently negative view of yourself: feeling not good enough, being harsh on yourself and expecting to fail or be rejected. Signs include constant self-criticism, difficulty accepting compliments, people-pleasing, fear of judgement, comparing yourself to others and avoiding challenges. Self-esteem is not fixed. It can be rebuilt with practice and, where needed, therapy.
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Signs of Low Self-Esteem
Harsh inner critic, believing others are better than you, difficulty saying no, needing constant approval, fear of making mistakes, perfectionism, avoiding new things, putting yourself down, struggling to accept praise, and staying in relationships or jobs that treat you badly.
Where It Comes From
Criticism or comparison in childhood, bullying, being compared with siblings or cousins, harsh parenting, trauma, a difficult relationship, repeated failures or social pressure about looks, marriage or career. In many families, children are praised for results more than for who they are.
Self-Esteem vs Confidence
Confidence is trust in your ability to do something. Self-esteem is your sense of your own worth. You can be skilled and still feel worthless. See our page on self-esteem and confidence counseling.
How to Build Self-Esteem
Notice and challenge the inner critic, talk to yourself as you would to a friend, keep promises to yourself, set small goals, stop constant comparison, practise saying no, spend time with people who treat you kindly, and keep a list of things you did well. Therapy, especially CBT, helps you change deep beliefs about yourself.
Where to Get Help in Pakistan
The Meeting Matters is a psychology practice in Islamabad, working since 2010. Sessions are by secure video from anywhere in Pakistan, or in person at our F-11/1 clinic in Islamabad, in Urdu, Punjabi or English, with evening and weekend slots. Message us on WhatsApp with what you are dealing with and a time that suits you. We usually reply within about 30 minutes and will suggest a suitable therapist. We are not an emergency service. If you or someone else is in immediate danger, contact your local emergency number or go to the nearest hospital.
Meet Therapists Who Can Help
Muhammad Naushad Anjum
Founder & Lead Psychologist — Couples, Marriage & Relationship Counselling
Tasmia Asghar
Clinical Psychologist, CBT, DBT & NLP Therapist
Ayesha Tariq
Clinical Psychologist — Relationship, Couples & Marriage Counselor
What Our Clients Say
“I had a really great experience at Meeting Matters Clinic in F-11. The therapists here are highly professional aur unka ravaiya bohat supportive hai. It’s not easy to find a safe space for mental health, but yahan ka mahol bohat pur-sakoon aur welcoming hai. They genuinely listen to your problems without any judgment. Highly recommended for anyone looking for good counseling in Islamabad.”
Subhan A. · Google Review
“I am truly grateful to Ms. Tasmiya Asghar and the team at Meeting Matters. I reached out during one of the most difficult periods of my life while dealing with grief and trying to be the best parent I could be for my children. Ms. Tasmiya's kindness, empathy, and guidance helped me navigate emotions that often felt overwhelming. She helped me understand my feelings, regain perspective, and think through practical ways of supporting my children and myself. I always felt respected, heard, and comfortable during our sessions. I would wholeheartedly recommend Ms. Tasmiya Asghar and Meeting Matters to anyone going through a challenging time and looking for professional support in a compassionate environment.”
Hashir K. · Google Review
“Have noticed alot of changes within myself because of the sessions I've had. My therapist is extremely kind and helpful. I've never once felt uncomfortable feeling like I'm talking to a stranger. My Dr has made me feel as if she's my own and has helped me a lot.”
Shagufta K. · Google Review
15+ Years of Experience You Can Trust
The Meeting Matters has been providing professional counseling, therapy and training since 2010 — over fifteen years of clinical experience supporting individuals, couples and families across Pakistan and around the world. Our psychologists are trained in evidence-based approaches including CBT, DBT, EMDR and psychodynamic therapy, delivered through confidential online counseling and online therapy as well as in-person sessions at our Islamabad clinic.
Explore Our Full Range of Services
Alongside specialist support for this concern, you have access to our full range of services — the same experienced team, available online or in person:
Individual Therapy
One-to-one online counseling and therapy for anxiety, depression, stress and personal growth.
Couples Counseling
Online relationship counseling for communication, conflict and rebuilding trust.
Marriage Counseling
Online marriage counseling for couples working through distress or disconnection.
Premarital Counseling
Guided conversations before marriage, available online.
Family Therapy
Family counseling for communication, parenting and conflict resolution.
Child Psychology
Child and adolescent therapy with parent guidance.
Online Therapy
Secure online therapy sessions from anywhere.
Corporate Mental Health Workshops
Workplace wellbeing programs for organisations.
Career Counseling
Support for career transitions and workplace stress.
Key Benefits
- Qualified psychologists and therapists
- Online anywhere in Pakistan
- Clinic in F-11/1, Islamabad
- Sessions in Urdu, Punjabi or English
- Evening and weekend slots
- Rated 4.7 on Google (424 reviews)
Frequently Asked Questions
Ready to Begin Your Journey?
Take the first step toward better mental health. Our compassionate team is here to support you.